I think it is lashing out to ban people for no reason. They were so upset by the trolls that people with legitimate criticisms were banned (which Zoot says they never had an issue with, it was only trolls they did not like) and then people just curious about the mod and asking questions were also banned.

Sorry, I seem to be misunderstanding you because I do not know what you quite mean anymore. You said “that’s how they read, especially when you compare their comments to the reddit post i linked. not even the sympathy for a person who leaves explains the difference to me” which I thought meant there was an overwhelming amount of people who were trolls for not having sympathy for the mod author leaving. Now you are saying that people were criticizing too much in the other threads, and I’m not sure what is being shrugged off as sympathy.

I typed a long ass comment on my phone and summit crashed not saving any of it, fucking hell. Anyway I have to refind all the comments again.

Here is where:

u/WoodenRocketShip

People absolutely dragged the mod and the mod author when the update with her boyfriend came out. Normally if people got that mad over something that happens in a mod you’d get pushback from others saying that it’s just not for you and it’s not your place to judge, but the mod author was also silencing critics and absolutely going off with her army of followers, so yeah no pushback everyone was on the same page. For a couple of weeks she and her mod were the big bads of this subreddit.

u/Live_Hippo_5885

That’s a bit wild silencing your critics changing her race and backstory is a bit drastic but it’s their mod I suppose, I don’t really care that she has a boyfriend I like having a bro to adventure with dude’s just kind of a dick imo.

u/WoodenRocketShip

Yeah see if it was just that, then I’d just chalk it up as a mod that I’m uninstalling and never thinking about it again as I barely liked Daegon before. If the mod author didn’t go around silencing criticism in the mod’s comments, some of which wasn’t even criticism and was from genuine fans curious about certain things, then I don’t think many people would have said anything.

People on this thread claimed they were banned for not liking the mod, asking questions about the mod, etc. before the comments section was removed altogether.

The context of the discord image joking about doxxing given by the Zoot guy defending the mod author is that it was a random discord user who they did not know who was known for being overdramatic and later on they think someone else told the user to cool it. Doxxing is serious to me so I do not think this context absolves the image, it feels worse since the mod author doesn’t even know the person and just gleefully agrees with them to the point another rando has to tell them to stop. I think the mod author is immature and the random user probably a teenager. It’s the only thing that makes sense why they would joke like that. I’m not digging for the discord, I’ve not only already wasted enough time with this comment since summit crashed on me but also find it a waste of time.

The thread talking about the mod author leaving was very sympathetic. My original comment had the top 9 or 10 comments and a few replies from the thread to prove to you that it was not overwhelmed by trolls. But there is no way I’m doing that again. Just read it yourself. If you still think they are not sympathetic enough then something is seriously wrong with your interpretation.

This is a both sides suck here for me.

I read a few of the reddit threads and there were legitimate criticisms that the follower started out cringey and edgy but a lore-friendly bratty elf and then after some big update the follower was turned into an over-the-top melodramatic edgy super evil non-lore-friendly entity (vampire demon dragon princess from another reality that is more powerful than any of the gods of TES) who now had a boyfriend equally evil with many voice lines about how much the two of them were horny for each other, and like to burn down inns full of people for fun.

There were some cringey guys upset they were being cucked, too many gamers in general are obsessed about the possibility of being cucked by some pixels and are ridiculously fragile about it.

But the mod author lashed out at both the trolls and people caught in the crossfire, the community became more upset, just an angry cycle. People asked about being able to download the old version before the changes since the mod author hid the older version - Nexus doesn’t allow mod authors to delete their work anymore so people’s mod lists don’t break but they for some stupid reason allow mod authors to hide older versions from users which can only be accessed by having the right link and it is a pain to get. Eventually the mod author releases the older version again as its own mod. But at this point the community hates them because of an image showing someome on the mod author’s discord talking about doxxing anyone who upset the mod author which the author offered gleeful support of.

There was a guy in the thread (ZootAllures9111) who said he helped develop and code the mod (you quoted him in your comment) and he said that practically all criticisms were trolls from kiwifarms, and that the person who wanted to doxx others on the discord was just being silly and edgy and only disingenuous people would take their silly edginess at face value. Also that they won’t play “this game with you” when asked how the mod author responded to this person wanting to doxx people because (CW:transphobia) the only image you need to look at is some random troll on a website called kiwifarms complaining about being a third wheel to two horny NPCs in the mod and something about being a cuck and that other followers don’t need sex to sell basically. Then when someone in the reddit thread asks why they keep posting and deleting their same comment with someone else chiming in confirming they also noticed this, the guy offers a reasonable explanation about network issues and then says, “I remember you from the comment sections of our mods now by the way, you are exactly as disingenous as I thought yesterday and you’re not gonna get anywhere pretending otherwise.” Which the innocent guy replies, “You should maybe take a break because you’re getting paranoid now. I’ve never used your mod, have no intention to, and the first time I’ve heard of all this drama was when this thread came up.”

Why mention this? Because I think it is shitty to “joke” about doxxing people and defend this “joking” and call everyone speaking out a troll from kiwifarm and I can see why the community doesn’t like the direction the author took and how annoying it is to not be able to go back to an older version of the mod. And I’ve read the threads, they were not overwhelmed with trolls unless you think people who criticize a mod author are always trolls. But I also think it is shitty and unacceptable how much harassment the author got. They are not the first author to get harassed off of Skyrim modding, even Vilja’s author was chased off for IMO stupid reasons. The Skyrim modding community is full of assholes, both mod authors and users alike. It used to be routine how many mod authors would lose their shit and delete their mods.

deleted by creator

I’m not going to down vote you lol, I haven’t down voted anyone in this thread. There is no wrong answer or response. I do feel bad for her though, pencils are sharp even when unsharpened, I can’t imagine that felt good. Did she wrap it in a condom? How old was she?

Girl same, it took me a couple of guys and years before I had an orgasm. Luckily my current partner is very patient with me and I hope you find someone like that too. I feel like a lot of maybe younger or inexperienced guys just jackhammer a girl and then they’re done ugh. Sorry for misunderstanding you earlier, looks like we had much more in common than I thought! Judging by the down votes it looks like I said something offensive, and I just wanted to say sorry about that. This is just my experience.

I think I did ask about that and since she doesn’t have trouble inserting the speculum she said I didn’t have it. I use menstrual cups with lube just fine, although I do use a cup on the softer side.

You’re probably right, I never used lube with tampons but if I did it might not have hurt so bad. I did feel it was less tight putting them in once my virginity was gone but it still felt like tearing using them so maybe that was just me. Just now I tried searching but all I got was tampons don’t take your virginity which I already knew and was not trying to imply. I use cups now with lube and it is much better than tampons for me.

Edit:

Will tampons hurt with endometriosis?

They can, but the tampon pain associated with endometriosis tends to be similar to endometriosis dyspareunia, a term used to describe pain during sex. With endometriosis, a tampon can cause a heavy pain felt deep in the abdomen, or cramping.

Sometimes the tampon pain related to endometriosis also can cause your vaginal muscles to tense, causing a sharp pain at the entrance of the vagina when inserting or removing a tampon.

TINA tip: If you have endometriosis, speak with your doctor about which options for managing your period might be most comfortable. Speak up about how you’re feeling so your doctor can help you determine which type of pain relief options might work for you.

TIL I may have had endometriosis this whole time. I was wondering how I was using tampons wrong when I have heavy flows that need tampon+pad to manage.

https://www.tinahealthcare.com/blogs/learn/tampons-cause-pain-or-discomfort

It feels like nothing but rubbing for me? Idk. But I definitely recommend the book. I’m not saying those 80% hate penetration, but it isn’t a big part. I know when I talked to my gyno about painful sex, she said use plenty of lube and orgasm before penetration. Very good advice in case anyone needs it.

I’m glad you found relief from the religious oppression. We need less shaming and better sex ed for everyone. Thanks for your wishes, I wish you the same!

Understandable. I was never into penetration and thought I was weird but after talking to more women and then reading Come As You Are, it clicked that I was actually normal and in the majority (80% are like me). Not that being in the minority is weird, if you read the book you’ll find that is actually normal too. I hate masturbation or sex without a vibrator lol. I never felt safe talking to my parents either, they were super religious and invaded my privacy regularly. I was an adult before getting toys, and everything sex related sucked before them.

I agree parents should talk with their kids, I never meant to allude to that. But I disagree that penetration doesn’t feel bad, for me it feels painful without lube and with lube it feels not painful but never enjoyable. Vibrators are the only thing that feels good, that much is universal among the women I’ve talked to.

Most teens don’t want to put anything up there because it hurts, even tampons hurt as a virgin especially with 0 lube. I never liked regular dildos, most women do not orgasm through penetration. So I would say they are messing with you. I’ve had guys ask me if I ever experimented with pencils or rulers because if they were a girl they would do it. No, wtf only guys think women are like this.

Admittedly I only read one mod post by you, the sticky. If the other ones are also important you can sticky more than two posts, which was the limit on reddit.

Being a mod sucks, I used to mod and I feel better now that I’ve abandoned it because I am just not suited for it. I’m sure everyone here appreciates your work into the community. I hated being the only person posting and some of my posts would get downvoted which was confusing. At least people are commenting, I didn’t even get that hah. I don’t mean my previous post to be an attack on your moderating, it’s a thankless job and you should have rules you feel is right as long as the community goes along with it I don’t see a reason to change. You’re not supposed to personally attack or insult people on your instance so it makes sense that is a rule.

I checked lemmy.world’s code of conduct and the official citizen code of conduct linked on the join-lemmy page that’s here. This is probably where we disagree about what is doxxing and why when I checked there wasn’t an actual rule for censoring usernames. If someone posts something with their real name and any other personal real info, they have doxxed themselves and I don’t think posting their name at that point is doxxing. This includes public figures too (reddit required you censor even the usernames of public figures and have banned people for posting a congress person’s Twitter handle even though their own rules are supposed to not apply to public figures, ban appeals denied). I’m not saying to post their personal address or phone number, but just the username/handle is fine because they have already provided that information. If their username is redbaron, and they haven’t posted their real name, then it is doxxing to post their real name in that case. I also don’t think censoring a username will stop someone from finding it especially if they want to do some malicious thing, I think that is wishful thinking at that point.

But all I was saying was that censoring usernames is/was not an actual rule in lemmy or lemmy.world or this community at the time. If you think that since this sub is for mocking people that you want to censor it so hopefully people don’t find the subject person to harass them then I guess it makes sense, I can see the logic. I do like the idea of holding a vote that everyone can see (I outlined why the ratio on my comment isn’t representative of the whole community). But I know it is a lot of work on one person and I am the wrong person to even bring this up, I was thinking of not commenting in this community again because the reddit hive mind is already here and I’ve also made things worse for you when you want actual contributors and mods and not people nitpicking a rule. I don’t think you are a bad guy, I’m sorry if my comments had a bad tone to them because that was not my intention.

I’ve been downvoted for saying facts just like I did with my previous comment here so I wouldn’t read into it as this is what the community for sure wants. I checked the rules and it was not there so I commented that, it’s not an opinion but people get triggered all the same because they are used to reddit’s rules and assume lemmy is like reddit. But it is not, the different instances have their different rules and communities have rules on top of that. If you want to change the rules that’s up to you. Generally a vote might be nice, one that everyone can see and it isn’t hidden in this comment chain (the OP of this chain is already hidden by downvotes) and isn’t determined by only 20 people. Personally, it’s a waste of time because you can easily lookup the tweet and find the person. But if people want it to be this way because they think it “helps”, I guess that’s how it will be. But at least the community will have a voice even if it is something I feel is a waste. I feel more irritated by the constant censoring of “bad words” and don’t care so much about the usernames, after all it can be easily looked up if you want. I wouldn’t downvote a post over it like OP said but I can see where the frustration comes from, how corporations want to sanitize the internet. Anyway, thanks for listening to my rambling.

I double checked the rules of this community and it doesn’t say anything about having to censor identity info, that was a reddit rule that you had to censor Twitter handles, usernames, and such.

I mostly drink water and tea so soda now feels too icky to drink but that hasn’t stopped me from enjoying other desserts. I don’t see myself giving that up lol I love it too much. If it works for you, then kudos to you. I just can’t dedicate myself to it. Especially not an entire year. I hope you don’t think I am putting you down or anything, if it works for you then you should stick to it.

That’s not the definition of intuitive eating, at least I’m pretty sure it isn’t. I look at the serving size of whatever I am eating on its packaging label, weigh it, log it, and eat it. I only eat that predetermined amount the manufacturer came up with. I don’t say maybe I’ll eat double this amount or half because my body feels differently that day. I eat the exact same thing of something every time I eat it. I stop eating when I’ve met my calorie count, not when my body feels sated. That’s calorie counting. As long as I eat throughout the day, I don’t feel much hunger. I’m pretty sure I have a slow metabolism and eating whatever I want in smaller portions has been working for me.

Yeah that doesn’t work for me, I actually enjoy eating food so eating “intuitively” makes me eat too much. That was a common complaint on r/CICO that eating intuitively made people regain their lost weight. There is a reason why people like me got fat in the first place lmao. Over-eating tasty food.

Once I learned what actual serving sizes are supposed to look like it got much more easy. It’s not stressful to count calories, I found it immensely stressful when I thought I was eating healthy low calorie meals but when I counted the calories using an actual scale I was actually over-eating and hated every second of it since I still felt hungry all day and the food tasted bad. Now I eat whatever I want or crave, including cheesecake, ice cream, burritos, spaghetti, burgers, and pizza. I’m not on a diet, I just adjust my portions. Once you get the hang of it, you can visually confirm you are eating too much or too little. This is how I like eating, nothing is off limits and very easy to tap a few times on my phone. My cheat day is everyday and I still lose weight. If I ever crave fish eyeballs, you can safely shoot me in the head lol.

It isn’t too hard to lose weight if that is your main goal, it just takes time. You don’t have to give up food that tastes good or that you love. Just eat under your TDEE and you’ll lose weight. Every meal can be a cheat meal. A food scale and counting calories are the only things you need. I’ve lost 30 pounds so far without doing any exercise and have lost 6 inches off my waist. There was a whole sub dedicated to it called r/CICO. I only need to lose 20 more pounds until my goal weight. I don’t eat food I don’t enjoy, that would be like torture to me.